Upon careful consideration I have decided to withdrawal my nomination for president for the following reasons:
I believe we should all work together to acheive our hopes and dreams for this great nation. I think it would be best to form an alliance with my opposition to further our country's goals. (*cough* Secretary of state *cough* Ahem, excuse me, I seem to have something in my throat.)
Secondly, I have evaluated our party's candidates, and have realized that my running mate is a madman.
Finally... I want the darn election to be over tomorrow.
Mz, the Mema / Dylan team would like to thank you for running a formidable and fierce campaign. We accept your concession and would like to offer you a position in our cabinet. You may have to thumb wrestle Pambo for the Secretary of State position, or at least toss a coin for it as she is a liberal pacifist and may not agree to thumb wrestle. We will, at any rate, find you a well placed position of influence not to mention a plushie chaise lounge chair at the inaugural BBQ.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Riggs, you are campaigning among your listeners for the right to put them in Gitmo? Might be kind of a hard sell, don't you think? Wouldn't it really be better to accept a cushy cabinet position like Ambassador to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame or perhaps Comissioner of Baseball?
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Riggs, you are campaigning among your listeners for the right to put them in Gitmo? Might be kind of a hard sell, don't you think? Wouldn't it really be better to accept a cushy cabinet position like Ambassador to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame or perhaps Comissioner of Baseball?
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Have a sip of the Kool-Aid. It's yummy. Besides, we need your evil genius to help us take back Congress. We are taking nominations for which members of Congress should be helped to investigate the benefits of a "monastic lifestyle".
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Of course you can... we will even make it dank and poorly lit if you prefer. Whatever makes you comfortable. I know... we will install you a beer fridge too.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Can you install a big red button too? It doesn't have to be connected to anything. I just want to feel like I can push "the button" at any time I feel necessary.
This is an OUTRAGE! I NEVER should have let you join MY ticket!
I would like to announce the RIGGS / RIGGS campaign will continue, and upon election ALL FFR LISTENERS will be added to my Axis Of Evil MAP!
You're either with me or against me!
Wear your summer clothes people! GITMO GETS HOT IN THE SUMMER!!!!!!
What??? You mean you're gonna let the others take summer clothes with them while I have to wear that stupid orange jumpsuit thing???!!!! Not fair, not fair AT ALL!!!
And there he is... Secretary of Theraputic Massage and Ambassador to Kentucky (Jack Daniels country!) ... assuming of course that you are willing to accept these cabinet appointments.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
I accept this position with all humility and all hands. I promise to have strict quality controls of all sour mash produced in the great (red) state of Kentucky.
Whachoo me, Jellybean? You just need to select your slot in the cabinet... Did you decide between Federal Reserve Chairperson, Chief Economic Advisor, and Secretary of the Treasury?
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Riggs, you are campaigning among your listeners for the right to put them in Gitmo? Might be kind of a hard sell, don't you think? Wouldn't it really be better to accept a cushy cabinet position like Ambassador to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame or perhaps Comissioner of Baseball?
GLADLY! You look DELICIOUS!!! 
