I have an update on my personal situation. It's over between Laura and I. I found out yesterday through the back door that Laurea was here yesterday to pick up more of her things. She's not coming back here, and will be moving from the shelter where she now is to a group home when space becomes available. For a lot of reasons, my emotions are all over the place right now. I hope that at some point Laura and I can at least talk because there is no sense of closure right now.
You can hope to be able to talk, but that may be very difficult for Laura. It's best that you to are separating right now. I know that you don't want to hear that- I'm sorry. Hang in there! Right now try and focus on yourself getting the help that you need so you can know that something like that will never happen again. And then you can be comfortable with yourself again.
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"Am I speaking in a language you're not getting here?"
It's ok woo-hoo, no offense taken, you're just being honest with me, which I appreciate, even though it's hard for me to hear. And just to be clear, I didn't mean that I hoped I could talk to Laura right now, I meant somewhere WAY down the line. I'm prepared for it not to happen though, and I'm going to let her dictate whether or not it does.
I'm so sorry things have turned out like this for you and Laura, but you are dealing with it the best way you can, I hope you get through all this and come out a much stronger person for it. You are in my thoughts Mel.
Mel, try writing Laura a letter. Put everything in it you want to say. Then don't send it, but tuck it away somewhere to hopefully use it in the future. It's not as good as talking to her, but it'll help you get some things off your chest that you want to say but can't.
