Men are like linoleum: Lay them once right and you can walk on them for the next 20 years.

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Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

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Men are like snowstorms: You never know when they are coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it will last.

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Men are like plungers: They spend most of their time in the hardware store or the bathroom.

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Men are like horoscopes: They always tell you what to do, and they are always wrong.

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Men are like coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, and keep you up all night long.

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Men are like coolers: Load them with beer, and you can take them anywhere.

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Men are like computers: Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

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Men are like vacations: They never seem to last long enough.

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Men are like fine wine: They all start out as grapes, and it is your job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd want to have with dinner.