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Post Info TOPIC: The 16 Ugliest Men In The History Of Rock 'n Roll


The Good Witch Of The South

    



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The 16 Ugliest Men In The History Of Rock 'n Roll


I am sorry, but I like Steven!

The 16 Ugliest Men In The History Of Rock 'n Roll

Lemmy

lemmy.jpg

Even if it wasn't for the solar system of terrifying warts, or whatever those things are, he'd still make the list. As it stands, this Motorhead legend is one of the Patron Saints of Ugly. An automatic, as they say. Wonder if he ever worries about one of those flesh biscuits falling off into his soup?

Roland Orzabal

orzabal.jpg

You have to admire a man who looks like Carrot Top's less-fortunate brother, is named both Roland and Orzabal, and is still successful. Apparently he conquered his fears. Maybe they should've been called Tears for Reflective Surfaces?

Joey Ramone

joeyramone.jpg

Hey, I admire him as much as anyone, but he was ugly. The man had no chin, not even a hint of one. It was just neck, then mouth. And it went downhill from there.

Mick Mars

mmars.jpg

A seemingly endless reservoir of hideous. Always looks like he's been dead since Wednesday, no matter what day it happens to be. His appearances (then and especially now) on the Motley Crue installment of Behind the Music made me want to call my parents and just chat.

Vinnie Vincent

vinnievincent.jpg

Don't believe me? Watch this. Vinnie is the one who looks like a monkey in a Rick Springfield wig, under the influence of Space Shuttle G-Force.

David Crosby

039_35433David-Crosby-Posters.jpg

Bald on top, pube curtains on the sides, a moustache that's almost certainly full of baloney sandwich crumbs, a penchant for hippie clothing, and a body like the Liberty Bell (the crack is where they installed the press-on liver). Nearly the complete package.

Ric Ocasek

ocasek.jpg

Hey Ric, why the long face? Wonder how many times he's heard that one? The man looks like a wax figure in a hot room. I bet even John Kerry mocks him.

Mick Jones

mjones.jpg

Proof once again that a person can be both unsightly and cool as hell. A musical genius who got short-changed on his earthly container. A classic Euro-Ugly.

Iggy Pop

iggy1.jpg

I know he's kind of old in this Shemp-Howard-on-a-bender pic, but even when he was a youngling Iggy could scare the varnish off a door. And I'm not talking about his ferociousness, either.

Perry Farrell

pfarrell.jpg

Just nostrils, tendons, and hair.

Steven Tyler

styler.jpg

Apparently the victim of a catastrophic mouth-muscle collapse. Looks like he got drunk one night and tried to stretch his lips all the way around a steering wheel, and the **** never fully snapped back.

Jim Skafish

Skafish Obsessions cover

Obscure? Perhaps. But look at that picture and tell me he doesn't belong on this list. No seriously, take another look at it. As my grandfather would put it, I wish I had his nose full of dimes. And Fantastic Sam's should refund his $8.00 without delay.

Gene Simmons

gsimmons.jpg

Don't believe me? Watch this. Gene is the one who looks like Epstein from Welcome Back Kotter after decades of Little Debbie abuse, wearing a leather jumpsuit, and making faces like he'd enjoy nothing more than a good bowel movement.

Bill Berry

bberry.jpg

Probably wouldn't have made the list if he'd just gone down to Revco and spent 99 cents on a pair of tweezers. One of the richest and most magnificent monobrow pelts in the history of recorded music. There's more wild black hair above his eye sockets than in an entire issue of Penthouse from 1978.

Sonic Youth (Entire Band)

syouth.jpg

It's quite an accomplishment when every member of a band is ugly, but these guys (and gal) pull it off. It's all Ricks and Bun Es in Sonic Youth, without even a suggestion of Toms or Robins. You've got to admire that.

Shane MacGowan

smacgowan1.jpg

Pasty, paunchy, perpetually drunk, and with a mouth like somebody stepped on a weak spot and fell through a porch. All hail the king!

Disagree with any of our selections? Who did we forget?


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Grand Poobah

    



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lol I will be putting my dinner back for a bit after that......bleh.gif

there's Slim Dunlap as well who took over for Bobby Stintson in the Replacements. lol I dunno, I just remember someone saying in Rolling Stone that he was "Rock's Butt-Ugly Guitarist". hahaha I thought he looked like Lyle Lovette if someone hit him in the head with a tree stump....smile.gif

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The Good Witch Of The South

    



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Lyle- that is a GREAT addition- why oh why Julia?

The ballet we went to last night had a whole ballet just to Lyle's music!

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Ghost In The Machine

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Even though I love The Stones, I'd have to add Mick Jagger to the list too.  Skinny as a rail, and lips twice as big as Steven Tyler's.  Good thing the man can sing!!!  smile

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I had a beautiful beautiful REM Document poster that was like 5' x 8'. My friend pothead johnny begged me for that for years! about 5 yrs ago I gave in and gave it to him. I always meant to have it framed, but that woulda been an $800- 1300 ordeal to do it right. And the duct-tape thing I did do was just falling off the wall. it was time to give it away to someone who would love it as much as I did in the past.....and re-do the duct tape anew.... I never woulda freed up that much money to do what i wanted with it.. So one day I made pothead johnny's day and gave the poster to him. He was nearly in tears. well, cuz he was always high and that was awesome duuuuude.....but I think a big part of why I was able to give it up was that a nice portion of the poster featured the Bill Berry larger than Bert from Bert and Ernie unibrow that is featured in said picture from this utter display of ugliness........laughing.gif I used to mow lawns smaller than that muppet thang that grew like vines from his skull....

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Ghost In The Machine

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I had to go look him up to refresh my memory of what he looks like.  Ewwwww!!  Those bush-babies sure are in need of making two separate units. 

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Is David Crosby that ugly? I would think there are a bunch of famous rock and rollers uglier than David.



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Ghost In The Machine

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Yeah I agree Web.  He doesn't look that bad to me.
David-Crosby-wm01.jpg

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Like Tom Petty for example:

tompetty.png




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Grand Poobah

    



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Hey David Crosby was the choice of surrogate father for Meliisa Ethridge's kid(s?) in the last decade or so? That choice must have been made somehow on talents and looks I'd guess... I saw him live a bunch of times- CSN, CSNY and CPR...CPR I was feet away from the man, and while I did not make an ugly or not judgement, (cuz what the hell why would I), I did think here is a guy that not only looks like Santa Claus, has the complete potential to lose himself in his performance to have as much joy as Santa Claus...

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"And like Web, I enjoy throwing JR under the bus.  Problem is, it's usually under the special bus that I ride every day". Ghostdancer 12-18-09


Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

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I know the gruesome visage is deliberate, but I have to say Marilyn Manson should be on the list...

marilynmanson300.jpg

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Ghost In The Machine

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Yep, I agree.  He wouldn't win any beauty contests even without the visual effects.
manson_mugshot.jpg

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Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

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Oh, and I think we have to state an obvious choice here...

michael-jackson-mugshot.jpg

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Ghost In The Machine

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Most definitely!!!  He shoulda stopped with the face work a looooong time ago.  bleh

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80's Rock Chick

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I agree with most of the people on this list, and certainly with Lemmy being at the forefront - ha ha.

Vinnie Vincent is such a personal favorite of mine, though. Anytime I've met him, he has been so sweet he looks better to me, if you know what I mean.

David Crosby, though? No way. Yes, he has a Santa type thing going on, but if you look at old footage, he's actually quite handsome. He has very nice facial features.

Iggy Pop - I wouldn't call him "ugly" either. Vein-y for sure.

And I don't think the Sonic Youth folks are all that bad, either.

I would probably go with more like Steve Grimmett of Grim Reaper:



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Phat Cat EL Presidente

    



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I always thought David Crosby looked like Gallager.





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80's Rock Chick

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Sparky wrote:

I always thought David Crosby looked like Gallager.

-----------------
I can see that.



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"Tell me, does it move you, Does it soothe you, Does it fill your heart and soul with the roots of rock & roll?
When you can't get through it you can listen to it with a 'na na na na', Well I've been there before"
-"Been There Before" by Hanson


80's Rock Chick

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Thought of some obvious ones that were missing.

The talented, but very ugly Bob Mould:




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"Tell me, does it move you, Does it soothe you, Does it fill your heart and soul with the roots of rock & roll?
When you can't get through it you can listen to it with a 'na na na na', Well I've been there before"
-"Been There Before" by Hanson


80's Rock Chick

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And I know Courtney Love isn't a man, but ... YUCK!
This is her real face, of course - not the post-surgeries faces.





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"Tell me, does it move you, Does it soothe you, Does it fill your heart and soul with the roots of rock & roll?
When you can't get through it you can listen to it with a 'na na na na', Well I've been there before"
-"Been There Before" by Hanson
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