HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029 - Freeze-Frame Radio

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TOPIC: HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029

WebGuy

Doesn't Do Windows

Status: Offline

Posts: 25589

Date: Tue Jul 8 19:40 2008

HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029	Permalink

HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029 Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia,formerly known as California White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language. Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock. Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped. Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage. Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels. France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica . No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation! Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking. George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036. Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only. 85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise are the keys to weight loss. Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs. Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba. Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays. Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative. Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches. New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030. IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent. Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines. __________________

confuzzed

Permanent State of Confusion

Status: Offline

Posts: 27006

Date: Tue Jul 8 19:44 2008

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I can't wait to see how many of these are true. __________________ Stop trying to be what you see. Be what you ought to be.

MzHartz

Permanent Vacation

Status: Offline

Posts: 23086

Date: Tue Jul 8 20:10 2008

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Unfortunately, I'd bet reality will be stranger... __________________

Dylan

Leader Of The Banned

Status: Offline

Posts: 21220

Date: Wed Jul 9 06:55 2008

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I can be found in Australia in 2028. __________________

disco strangler

Smiles everyone, smiles!

Status: Offline

Posts: 8321

Date: Wed Jul 9 08:33 2008

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i'll be sixty three ... or dead. hopefully not 250 pounds. and there will be no social security left, so i'll probably be working 24/7 to pay for postage... __________________ You should fear anything that can bleed for seven days without dying... (as told to Mr. DS on 3-12-10)

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