I just saw this on Yahoo and thought I'd share it with you guys. I like this one: Employee's wife burned all his clothes and he had nothing to wear to work.
The Most Ridiculous Excuses For Missing Work Mon, 10/27/2008 - 4:00am by SavvySugar
There are two main points that I took away from reading the results of a recent Careerbuilder survey: Some bosses actually drive by employees' homes when they've called in sick, and some people will say anything to get out of going to work. Both parties are guilty, but the boss might be doing more damage than the employee in this case.
Thirty-one percent of the employers surveyed said they follow up with employees who call in sick, some require doctor's notes, others check in by calling, and a creepy percentage drives by the employee's home. The employers reported actual excuses they've heard, and the most unusual responses are below. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but really, most of these are ridiculous. Which do you think is the worst?
Employee didnt want to lose the parking space in front of his house.
Employee hit a turkey while riding a bike.
Employee said he had a heart attack early that morning, but that he was all better now."
Employee donated too much blood.
Employees dog was stressed out after a family reunion.
Employee was kicked by a deer.
Employee contracted mono after kissing a mailroom intern at the company holiday party and suggested the company post some sort of notice to warn others who may have kissed him.
Employee swallowed too much mouthwash.
Employees wife burned all his clothes and he had nothing to wear to work.
Employees toe was injured when a soda can fell out of the refrigerator.
Employee was up all night because the police were investigating the death of someone discovered behind her house.
I believe the donated too much blood one. When I used to donate blood, it would knock me down so hard, that I thought about calling in to work. I finally decided it probably wasn't a good idea for me to donate blood.
I got sent home from work after donating blood once because I got very, very sick to my stomach. They even called Kev-o to come get me because they wouldn't let me even try to drive myself. I can totally believe that one.
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MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
That is a good one. I have actually used it before, when I worked for a different boss. He was okay with that excuse because he knew I had been working too many hours and had a bunch of garbage going on at home. Great guy....
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
I know Carl would understand it. Just not sure how he would react. He used to tell me all the time that I need to take "soft skills" classes. In one of those conversations, he actually complimented me on my handling of a particular situation. I told him it's not that I don't know how to do all that soft skills stuff, and it's not that I don't do it sometimes... it's simply that most of the time I just flat don't give a schizzle about doing it. He had no response other than to gasp like a goldfish out of water.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.