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MzHartz


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Helpless by Michelle Hartz
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I posted this to my blog, but I know people here expressed interest in reading it, so I thought I'd post the link here as well:

http://hartzdesign.com/Temp/Helpless.pdf (Right click and select "Save Link As" to save it to your computer.)

I don't think it's my greatest piece of work.  So my feelings would not be hurt if you tell me it sucks.  And if I don't receive any comments, I'm going to assume it sucks anyway.

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confuzzed


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Gee, seems like you are in a good mood too.

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MzHartz


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Nah, I really want it to be good enough to sell. But I want honest feedback, and I want everyone to know it's okay to tell me if it's not good enough.

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JD The Jazz Doctor


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I read up to the part when they were coming up upon the wnd farmand it smelled like the tanned deer hides.

I liked it so far, seems very rooted in the realities of the reactive personalities we have to common situations that break us from our monotonus modes &  yet upset our comfort zones. We try to retreat to a sanctuary of water, the earth, the night, but these  are a foreign and alienated retreat for us city folk. We are not connecting, nature is foreign. there's no cell phones in twighlight dew. & we cannot long for some sort of reconnection to the earth we never knew anyhow. We're not primal, we're wussies. We cannot long for a reconnection to something that never existed for us, but was always right before our very eyes. The mud and snow we walked on on our way to the video store to rent a nature video to be all deep and educated.....

I'd read more, but I am tired. What am I, like on page 2? rofl.gif 



-- Edited by JD The Jazz Doctor on Thursday 3rd of December 2009 11:50:45 PM

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MzHartz


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Yeah, you're not very far JD, no one's even died yet! ;)

What I was trying to do there was set the scene and show the way Rebecca was before the accident. Strong, motivated, ambitious. I also wanted them to be mad at each other, because then when Brandon thinks she's dead, there's some guilt thrown in there, making the loss seem even greater.

Switching topics for a moment:

How do you spell Rebecca? This is the way I've always spelled it, but spell checkers want to change it to Rebbecca or Rebecka or Rebeka. I want the most normal spelling possible. Which one is it?

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confuzzed


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Rebecca

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WebGuy


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Becky



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Lady Strange


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I agree with Fuzzy. Though there are many ways to spell that name, that's the one I've seen the most in my travels.

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JD The Jazz Doctor


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your way...

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Mad Mema


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I believe the most common is Rebecca, but I have a niece named Rebekah.

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Lady Strange


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Mad Mema wrote:
I believe the most common is Rebecca, but I have a niece named Rebekah.
Ugh - that must get misspelled ALL the time!

 



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"Tell me, does it move you, Does it soothe you, Does it fill your heart and soul with the roots of rock & roll?
When you can't get through it you can listen to it with a 'na na na na', Well I've been there before"
-"Been There Before" by Hanson
Mad Mema


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Yeah, and it really irritates her.

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