On three separate occasions I've noticed a smell that makes me think someone has farted in my apartment. It only lasts a few minutes, but it has me concerned.
The way I see it, only one of the following options is possible:
A) A neighbor has gas so powerful it actually permeates the walls and infects my apartment.
B) I've reached that age where I'm passing gas and don't even realize it.
or C) I'm being haunted by a ghost with gastrointestinal problems. Perhaps it's my Dad thinking he's funny.
ALL of the options are beyond disturbing to me.
-- Edited by Jeremy Riggs on Wednesday 23rd of December 2009 11:24:50 AM
I can see where the phantom fart smell would be disconcerting. I'd suppose you could rule out item 'A' fairly easily... visit each of your neighbors and ask if the are obnoxiously gassy. This will probably not endear you to them, but there is the off chance that someone will claim it... then you can kindly ask them to quit staining your air.
If it is you... invest in a gas mask my friend! It only goes downhill from here.
If it is the ghost of your dad, I don't know what to tell you. Donald still harrasses me from beyond. Just the other day he took the framed "Certificate of Appreciation on behalf of a grateful nation.." (signed by W) off my living room wall and laid it on my sofa.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Hey! What are we grateful to you for? Nobody asked me! Not that I'm NOT grateful, I just would have liked to have been asked before we declared that the nation was grateful to you. I mean after all, I'm part of the nation ain't I? Well ain't I?
Not to me, JR... to Donald for his 21 years of service in the United States Marine Corps. It is one of the things the family gets when a service member dies.
Technically you, as part of a grateful nation, SHOULD be a little grateful to me but I cannot tell you what I did to deserve your gratitude. If I did so, I would be required to terminate your life functions AND submit myself for prosecution.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
Technically you, as part of a grateful nation, SHOULD be a little grateful to me but I cannot tell you what I did to deserve your gratitude. If I did so, I would be required to terminate your life functions AND submit myself for prosecution.
Well then let's just keep that your secret, shall we?
Thanks to Donald though. I certainly appreciate the sacrifice anyone in uniform has made for our country.
We got a certificate, flag, etc. when my Dad died too. But I never really looked at the certificate, my Mom has it.
This certificate is awarded by a grateful nation in recognition of devoted and selfless consecration to the service of our country in the Armed Forces of the United States."
(signature of the President)
Very simple but dignified. Check your dad's out sometime.
No worries... I'm taking that secret with me. I like living my boring little life as I do instead of in a dank sub-basement of a federal prison.
__________________
MM
That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.
You must've been a really poor college student!
