You are much more word smithy that I is.

Where would we be without words?

Have you heard that Miller Lite commercial? Where they're training international beer refs? They used to play it every day on my way home from work (those 10 minutes I can't listen to FFR!).

I like the one where they are saying something about Miller Lite in a bunch of different languages, and it ends with the one just clicking. I think it's funny. I'm easily amused.

Oh look, a kitty!!!

Hey D!

Fancy seeing you still here.

You always make me feel special D.

Not Special K . . . Special D.

You only know my forum persona.

In real life I'm a big old fat jerk.

I could have that verified for you if need be.

Sounds more like an out of tune tuba.

I say Tuba!

Only if its dolphin safe though.

Now penguins . . . well stuff happens.

Taco Bell?

A man was driving down the highway with a car full of penguins. Penguins
sticking out the windows, penguins coming out the sunroof, penguin
everywhere. A cop pulled him over and told him if he didn't want a ticket
he'd better take those penguins straight to the zoo. The man promised he
would and drove off.

The next day, the same highway, the same car, the same guy, the same cop and
the same penguins - only this time the penguins were all wearing sunglasses!
The cop pulled the guy over and said, "I thought I told you to take these
penguins to the zoo!"
"I did" said the guy, "Today I'm taking them to the beach!"

"A Mexican newspaper reports that bored Royal Air Force pilots
stationed on the Falkland Islands have devised what they consider a
marvelous new game. Noting that the local penguins are fascinated by
airplanes, the pilots search out a beach where the birds are gathered
and fly slowly along it at the water's edge. Perhaps ten thousand
penguins turn their heads in unison watching the planes go by, and
when the pilots turn around and fly back, the birds turn their heads
in the opposite direction, like spectators at a slow-motion tennis
match. Then, the paper reports, "The pilots fly out to sea and
directly to the penguin colony and overfly it. Heads go up, up, up,
and ten thousand penguins fall over gently onto their backs."
--Audobon Society Magazine.