Story Line - Freeze-Frame Radio

Dylan · Leader Of The Banned

RE: Story Line

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

Screeeeeech !! came the sound of a set of Yokahama 20 inch low profiles.

" That'll be $12.50 " said the driver .

" Heres a ten , keep the change " said our nameless one as he exited the cab. Tripping over a possum our hero made his way up the stairs . Upon entering he noticed an all but to familiar odor .

" let me guess " he said while approaching the front desk , " Taco night ?"

" Si Senor , care for a nacho ? " asked the girl behind the desk .

" Thank you but I'll pass . I'm looking for my niece , she's with the magic show " said guy xx .

" down the hall ,turn right , 2nd door on the left " she answered while wipeing cheese off her face.

As Guy entered the 3rd door on the right he spotted his niece. She was in the box you get put in when you get sawed in half. Aha , he thought , the ole disappearing rabbit act . He pulled up a chair and waited for the show to end . Or for all the old people to fall asleep , whichever came first.

-- Edited by jstdve at 21:23, 2006-01-21

-- Edited by jstdve at 21:24, 2006-01-21

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

After the curtain fell ( litteraly , took out 2 old timers) Guy X ( he changed it to a capital X during intermission ) went back stage to find out why Dylan had taken away her cushy high paying with benifits job at the pentagon

" Well lets here it " sighed guy X .

" I was working on a semi-secret mission code named Victoria ",answered Jane," I was to infiltrate a foriegn govt. and learn their secrets . With my disguise in tow , I headed north into the foriegn country mentioned ( but not by name ) 2 lines ago. I gathered all the information I could and headed home. 2 days after turning in my report I was called into my supervisors office. He wanted to know if I could elaborate on page 3 where I had written- get more Russians. I told him in order for them to achieve their 'goals' they would need more speed . Then he asked in an odd voice what country did I go to and I said Ottawa , then he asked what govt officials I had spied on and I said - The Senators.

Dylan · Leader Of The Banned

What Jane had failed to realize was she had been duped, not by a rogue nation. Not a communist country. It wasnt even a terrorist faction. No, her nemesis was more evil, more insidious and more shadowy than any of those....she had been duped by the NHL.

The Russians she needed more of were skating lines, goalies and zamboni drivers. When she realized it, it was too late.

Because the NHL has a terrible TV package, no one would even know her whereabouts...if you cant see something on TV, does it even exist?

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

" well" said X , "after that lengthy explanation and commentary , theres only 1 thing to do "

" what would that be ?" inquired Jane

" get a better package from your local cable co." and with those words of wisdom X bid her a fond farewell and headed out the door .

" Taxi " yelled X as the door of yet another nightmare involving under educated and overly developed relatives closed behind him. Screeech ! went a set of Michelin Alpine Pilots. X recognized the driver . He stumbled over a muskrat and fell into the back seat.

" where to ? o- gratuatis one ? asked the snuff dipping driver .

" Somewhere where a guy can chill , relax and forget his troubles ' sighed X

" I know just the place " said the diver while flicking off the ashes from a Marlboro , a set of BF Goodriches squeeled off into the night.

BRB

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

Thumpittty thumpitty thumpity thump , The 4 Mickey Thompson Baja Radials came to a halt.

" This be thee place " quiped the driver " that'll be $6.75 ."

" Thanx " said X as he exited the cab " put it on your bill " . A set of cheap Walmart tires wobbeled off into the darkness.

X eyed the sign on the door, Jay Deeze Jazz n Billiards Club was written in small crayola letters.

Hmm thought X , this might work. Sidestepping an otter he entered .

10 minute break ( writers have a good union )

-- Edited by jstdve at 14:57, 2006-01-22

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

The sound of Sarah Vaughn went thru my living room as X looked for a table. As it was - ex cons from Milwaukee in a tuxedo night , it took a few minutes to find one. Spotting a table he headed over to it, sat down and motioned to the waitress . She ignored him . X waved at the other waitress , who , after deciding she was just bored enuff to work , headed his way. ( care to venture a guess where this is going ? )

" What'll it be ?" she asked in a voice that almost ( but not quite ) cared.

" how about an 8x10 glossy pic of yourself and a double shot of triple sec." said X with a stupid grin on his face. She smiled coyly ( e- mail CP for definition ) and went to the bar to fill his order . Just as the band was was finishing up Tony Bennet's version of Firefly the waitress returned .

" Here's your 7 and 7 , and one 8 x10 pic of me , that'll be.. lets see " she said while scribbling on a pad , " 7 + 7 +8 + 10 = 32 + tip and traveling exspensises comes to $76.50 . X handed her 2 ticket stubs from the Russian ballet and looked down at his pic.

There was nothing there but a small box with a red x in it...

Dylan · Leader Of The Banned

(the 7+&+8+10=

)

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

CRASH !! Guy X looked up just in time to see a nine ball fly thru the front window closely followed by what could only be described as a penguin trying to pass himself off as an ex-con from Milwaukee in a rented tux.

" Nice shot ! " came a voice from the back room . X glanced over his shoulder and couldn't believe who he saw standing there with a 2 piece custom pool cue. It was the world renown trick shot artist Ida hoe Slimfast . She nodded her head , chaulked her stick and in a voice that would make a demacrat vote for Bush said " next "

" That.. that would be me " came a timid voice from the mob that had gathered around the vixen from New Mexico. The crowd parted like the sea in that story about a bunch of doomed Arabs.

back in a bit - burger time.

-- Edited by jstdve at 19:29, 2006-01-23

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

No ! thought Ida , it couldnt be ! but it was . New England Bob emerged from the crowd. Ida's heart skipped a beat , Sparky's head hit his desk. Here before her was the one man who had managed to do what no other man could , balance his checkbook . Bob walk over to the table eyeing Ida like a Frenchmen eyes the Eifel tower.

" Rack em " he said . She did . Bob crawled away. X's eye's returned to the 8x10 glossy pic. It had somehow transformed from a blank page with a red x in a box ,to a pic of a lovely young lady .

" Lovely young lady ? " came a voice from behind the bar, " What the hell is that crap ? Is Dave sucking up to the girls again ? " X slowly looked up...

brb , JR says i gotta request a tune or else...

Dylan · Leader Of The Banned

JR can be a bastard sometimes

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

Leaning on the bar was a well dressed man holding a mint julip . " He'll do it every chance he gets ' he added . X got up and wandered over to the bar.

" Hello I'm X-guy " he said while extending his hand .

" Nice to meet you , I'm Willy Waco " he said " bartenender , another round over here . "

They both kicked back and started talking the normal guy in a bar stuff -Pledge or Endust , brown or black shoes...

" If Dave don't quit sucking up I'm gonna be sick " said the bartender while shaking his head.

" I hear ya on that one " came a voice from the back of the studio.

As there was nothing else left to talk about , X bid them all a good night and headed for the door. Did he just do it it again ? thought a man living in Oklahoma . That would be a yes , thought a man living in a big red state.

" Taxi ! " X yelled , silence filled the air . X bundled up his coat, turned up his collar and started the long walk home.

Dylan · Leader Of The Banned

And now a word from our sponsor...

Pledge furniture polish

And Black Shoes Incorporated

jstdve · CEO - The KOTO Co.

Look I can see myself ! and don't my new black shoes look good on me !