You  can't read this and stay in a bad mood 
  
1.  How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? 
  
Unique  Up On It. 
  
2.  How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? 
  
Tame  Way, Unique Up On It. 
  
3.  How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? 
  
They  Take The Psycho Path 
  
4.  How Do You Get Holy Water? 
  
You  Boil The Hell Out Of It. 
  
5.  What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall? 
  
Dam! 
  
6.  What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long? 
  
Polaroid's 
  
7.  What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work? 
  
A  Stick 
  
8..  What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours? 
  
Nacho  Cheese. 
  
9..  What Do You Call Santa's Helpers? 
  
Subordinate  Clauses. 
  
10.  What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? 
  
Quattro  Sinko.. 
  
11.  What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow? 
  
Spoiled  Milk. 
  
12.  What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire? 
  
Frostbite. 
  
13.  What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches? 
  
A  Nervous Wreck. 
  
14.  What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? 
  
Anyone  Can Roast Beef. Can you pea soup?  
  
15.  Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs? 
  
Right  Where You Left Him. 
  
16.  Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? 
  
Because  They Have Big Fingers. 
  
17.  Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive? 
  
Because  It Scares The Dog. 
  
18.  What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic? 
  
Sanka. 
  
19.  What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?  
  
The  Location Of The Dirt Bag.  
  
20.  Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?

Because  They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat. 
  
21.  What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver? 
  
A  Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang! 
  
A  Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack. 
  
22.  How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The  Same? 
  
Some  body's Gonna Lose A Trailer 
  
Now,  admit it. At least one of these made you smile   
  
Work  Hard, Do Your Best, Keep Your Word, Never Get Too Big For Your 
Britches, Trust  In God and Never Forget a  Friend.