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Tennessee Gal


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OK guys, I hope I haven't worn out my forum's ear yet.  I'm afraid it's more marital woes.  Just wondering what you all think. 


Back in August, I booked our Fall Break vacation to Disney.  The four of us were going to take the camper down to the Disney campground, Ft. Wilderness for the week.  Ended up, hubby left, so rather than disappoint the s and lose part of my money for cancelling, I took my parents and the s and we stayed at one of the economy Disney hotels for about the same price.  Now...


I had told hubby that he could stay in the house while we were gone, because supposedly, he was sleeping in our camper w/ no electricity nor running water at a client's vacant house.  He said he was going to a convenience market for the restrooms and showering at the station. (Am I gullible or is this believable to you all out there).


Anyway... I try calling hubby several times during the week on home phone (never answered).  We come home a day early from our trip because hubby has told me he is moving things out that Saturday.  I thought it best that I be here so that he doesn't take everything and the kitchen sink.  I had thought he would be at the house that Friday night.  He never showed up. 


Once I get home, I get in my self-detective mode  and find that my husband had  gone to Gatlinburg the weekend before while we were at Disney.  Gatlinburg is in the heart of the Smoky Mtns., It's a touristy area w/ National Park and lots of shopping and eating and souvenirs.  Very Wisconsin Dellish.  So... when Mike shows us Saturday morning I ask him how Gatlinburg was, who did he go with, what did he do.  His answers were, "fine, friends from work, and stuff". 


Here's the question:  How many of you all out there believe him?  Do guys go to national parks together?  Mike's not a nature nut, doesn't hunt, hike, do photography or anything like that.  There's no casinos or nightclubs.  Oh yeah, and as of the last time I asked, he had no friends on his detail.  His friends that I've known for years are married and I think he would have named them individually.  Oh yeah, one more thing, after my questions, he asked me how I found out about it.  Does that sound like an man to you.


Help me out here guys.  I'm thinking the worst.  If you think his story holds water, please let me know.  Everybody here in TN thinks he's a lying cheating SOB. 



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JD The Jazz Doctor


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he's lying tg.... the one word response answers. sorry.

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Tennessee Gal


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As I feared.  Thanks for taking the time to read my novel.  Guess this means I might now be free and clear to come up to Chicago for the FFR reunion next summer w/ Ruby and everybody else!!

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JD The Jazz Doctor


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It would be certainly nice to meet everyone who can visit face to face.


Of course, come back and check this thread often and see what the others have to say. So many caring people here. Good people to talk to. I just know so many here are more than happy to bend an ear, share stories and feelings. Really wonderful people.



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Ruby


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I'm sorry TG, but agree something seems fishy. Maybe he did not leave you for someone,but maybe has met someone since he left. I feel for you what pain you muct be going through, stay strong and pray for peaceful thoughts and try to move on. If he comes back, you know you would be happy, but if he thinks the grass is greener somewhere else, let him learn the hard way. It might be for a bit, but he will end up where you two were eventually- in that comfort zone. Pray.

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Sparky


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I can't sit here and tell you that he is truly cheating on you. It does sound a little odd. Do you get the credit card statements? If so I would ask them for a detailed statement to see what all was purchased. Usually you can add it up. If he went with Friends Lunch = $15.00(because he would buy just his) If he went with "someone else" Lunch= $35.00.


I'm sorry to hear about this TG, take care.



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MzHartz


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Hard one to give an opinion on. How did you find out?

It's possible that he also felt gypped by not getting to go to Disney World, so he made his own vacation. Or, he made his own vacation to show you that he can have fun on his own. If that's the case, he probably didn't have fun and wallowed in self pity the whole time. Or he didn't really go, but wanted to make you think he did, again to show that he can go on his own vacation. Kind of like saying, "Fine, I don't need to go to Disney, I can have more own fun without leaving the state. So ha."

Basically, it comes down to, what do you WANT to believe.

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darleneapd


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Tenn Gal, I surely know what you are going through. I was married 11 years and had a beautiful 15 year old daughter when my marraige went in the toilet.  From the experiences that I have had dealing with a simular situation, I just have to say "GO with your instinct."  A woman's intuition is usually right.  I know that, because I had some of the same Questions to my husband and he just answered vaguely and I tried to believe him, but I knew there was just someone else. 


Long story short, men do have the urge to see if "the grass is greener on the other side".  As Ruby said.  Instead of giving himself some time to just be alone and evaluate all the issues that caused the marriage to break up, for some odd reason they just move on immediately with the first woman who pays any attention to them.


If your intuition is telling you he's seeing another woman, you are probably right.  You know this man better than anyone, so I hate to say it, he's probably a liar.


Feel free to send me any email privately if you want to talk about this or email me at : darleneapd@yahoo.com  Hope you find answers soon TG..  till then I'll be praying for you.



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Sparky


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I love my Allycat, we have been together for 11 years, and I like her grass and have never wanted any other. Sure like any guy I like to window shop but never in a million years would I try on the merchandise.  There seems to be a lot of bitterness towards men and we all get clumped into that. Sure alot of them ARE scumnerts but like Darlene said just trust your instincts and the truth will come out eventually.

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Woo Hoo


The Chosen Woo

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ok can i just go kick some azz already?! I hate to see you going thru so much!


I think he his lying as well. Can't really say exactly what he is lying about though.I can't really say it any better than anybody else but you know how to contact me.


 


In response to Sparky: We all window shop. It's human. Some of us are big flirts.


The difference is that many of us don't act upon this stuff. And then there's the other half that DO believe that the grass is greener on the other side. They are the ones that give us harmless flirts a bad rap!



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disco strangler


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i'm so sorry.  i do know what you are going through.  been there done that  a couple times even   but we are all survivors of some sort, right?


as far as opinions go...  i believe he is lying.  it also seems as though he does not want to hurt your feelings (more than he already has), by telling you that he is staying at a place with no utilities, when more than likely he is staying with someone (could be a male friend or could be a female "friend").  as far as gatlinburg...  i believe he was more likely than not with someone other than guy friends. 


as far as opinions go... it's just an opinion that is based on personal experience.  maybe that makes it distorted...  i can't tell someone "what they should do", i can only say what i've done. 


as far as whether or not you are gullible... no, i don't think so.  i think you are hopeful.


 


 



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